Cao An returned home after her second session.
“She’s trying hard and is being very cooperative when receiving treatment,” he said. “I can tell she’s trying to improve.”
“In the future, the doctor will fax you directly with her records after every consultation. He might even reach out to you. With the family involved in her treatment, the results will be much better.”
He hoped so.
Cao Yang smoked silently. Translated by The Novelst
Cao An had left for half a month. This matter couldn’t be concealed from Cao Xiong.
It seemed like Cao Xiong hadn’t expressed his temper in quite a while. He even personally called Xia rou.
Cao Yang was unsure what his father had told Xia Rou on the phone. But still she didn’t return. Cao Xiong could only sigh and not force her any further.
Already knowing the results, Cao Yang walked out of Cao Xiong’s study with disappointment.
Cao An also sighed as he watched his brother smoke quietly in the corridor.
Everyone had believed it was a good thing. Xia Rou would stay in the Cao Family and truly become one of them. They didn’t need to worry that she would be bullied after marrying to another family.
But how had things come to this point?
Even though Xia Rou… her mind was so clear…
He remembered the day they were feeding the ducks with bread crumbs at the riverside. She had brought up He Chengzhe.
“But he likes you. And you like him… why did you treat him like that?” she had asked.
“Towards the person you like, isn’t it natural that you should treat him better?”
“Life is full of surprises. We don’t know if we might suddenly die someday.”
“Even if you are super lucky and get to live again, you can never go back to the same past. You won’t be able to find that same person any longer.”
“The things you did wrong can’t be corrected.”
“The things you regret can’t be changed…”
“Don’t let yourself regret.”
At that time, Xia Rou had looked at the surface of the water, expression calm.
If it wasn’t that her figure was too skinny, it would have been unnoticeable that she was currently suffering from insomnia, depression and delusional disorder.
Even though… she looked so… sober.
Cao An also lit up and called He Chengzhe. “I’ve returned. Where are you?”
“Mn, I have something to tell you.”
“Let’s speak in person.”
With Xia Rou’s agreement, the doctor would send the medical report to Cao Yang every week.
Cao Yang didn’t need to read the doctor’s analysis – just by reading the transcript of their conversation, he could already imagine the struggles and pain that Xia Rou was facing.
Big brother: the man she imagined, to her… was too heavy. It was the source of all her pain.
As time passed, Xia Rou didn’t recover from delusional disorder, but her insomnia slowly got better with the doctor’s help.
The communication between the doctor and Xia Rou became deeper.
As they delved deeper into conversation, the more big brother began to become almost lifelike.
This man… seemed to have existed in Xia Rou’s life for many years.
This existence… had already been carved in Xia Rou’s bones.
One day, the doctor asked Xia Rou an important question.
Doctor: 【Do you love them? Either one of them?】
Xia Rou: 【……】
Doctor: 【Oh, maybe I should ask the question separately.】
Doctor: 【Do you love “Yang”?】
Xia Rou: 【I… don’t know…】
Doctor: 【Then, what about “big brother”? Do you love him?】
The doctor had written a remark beside the record that the patient remained quiet for so long that he thought she was declining to answer the question.
But in the end, she did answer.
【I do not…deserve.】
The corner of the paper crumpled under Cao Yang’s hand.
“Xiao Rou, why do you look down on yourself?” He asked her angrily.
Xia Rou remained silent.
“How are you worse when compared to others? What have you done wrong? Xia Rou, you’re just making blind, disorderly conjectures!
“Didn’t you want to want to know why I liked you? Didn’t you always feel that Wang Man was the person who most matched me? Well let me tell you this. No matter how excellent Wang Man is, who cares? In my eyes, you’re the best!
“It’s not just me. In this house, who has ever treated you badly? Did any of them owe you? No. Then why did they treat you well? That’s because you’re worth being treated well by others!
“Everyone has their own shortcomings, and everyone has their own virtues. You have your good points: because of these you are you! Because of these, others like you and treat you well!
“Xia Rou, just come back! If you can’t accept me and don’t want to see me again, that’s fine. I’ll stay far from you. You just have to live well on your own.
“Don’t go too far away. If you’re too far I can’t help if something happens.”
“I don’t need you to be rich. I just want your life to be peaceful and happy, with a man who truly understands, cherishes and loves you. That’s enough.”
“Cao Yang…” Xia Rou’s voice suddenly sounded on the phone. It sounded like she was moved, the ends of her words fluttering.
“I said just come back,” he replied. Translated by The Novelst
“No, the last thing you said, you… what did you say?” she asked.
Proofread by: Hannah
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